A Caelo Usque Ad Centrum
by Thinkette
Summary: "Juvia is the rain woman. Juvia has always been the rain woman, and Juvia just waits for the day that Gray-sama understands that rain is vital. Juvia waits for Gray-sama to understand that Juvia is vital: To understand that Juvia has always been vital."


"Hello, Mother….it's August 3rd, so, Juvia is here, like Juvia always is." She said, her blue hair curling tentatively under her hat. There was a soft and forlorn mask on her face, her eyes seemingly glittering. Around her, the rain poured, covering her in what seemed like a thin membrane of protection.

"Juvia…has come to pay her respects." She said, her lips moving softly, barely seeming to stretch over her teeth as the vowels exit. She grimaces as she hears her voice and the rain grows stronger, louder, covering the sound and saving her from another cringe. She sighs.

"Juvia is sorry, mother…Juvia forgets, sometimes." A pause eclipses over her, the soft hands she possesses fluttering over her skirts as she looks at the floor, unceremoniously sitting down at the grave. She feels her fingers shake as she smooths over the fabric but decides to ignore it. "J-Juvia forgets sometimes that…you never…never wanted those you loved to…to pay for your mistakes." She chokes out, feeling the rain heat against her pale skin. She swallows, feeling the line of her throat move and quiver.

"Juvia…misses you…but things have…well, they've gotten easier for Juvia. Juvia has friends now, no more orphanage…or Phantom Lord…but Gajeel-kun is still with me. Remember, he came with Juvia to your grave last year? He…he couldn't this time…he is…is out with Levy-chan."

She smiles, the softness of her voice matching the curve of her pout. "Juvia is happy that Gajeel-kun could find her…she saves him from his sadness…you thought he had a lot of sadness when you met him…Juvia knows. Juvia thought he had a lot of sadness too…"

The rain seems to crescendo, arching around her as she bows her head, her entire body seeming to soak and be wrung out every second she spends at the dirt. "Juvia has found someone…who takes away her sadness as well." She chuckles.

"His name is Gray-sama…you would laugh, mother. Juvia has only known him for a few months. Juvia knows that to mother, it has been 7 years since Juvia visited, but to Juvia, it has only been a few months…Juvia is sorry for not visiting…Juvia was attacked by a dragon."

The rain grew heavy and thick, staining the earth and her dress, covering her in what seemed to be an ocean of salty tears from the sky.

"But…Juvia survived…Juvia survived and now, Juvia lives….it was hard for Juvia to live for a while until Juvia found Gray-sama! Gray-sama dried Juvia's tears…he showed Juvia the sunshine." The woman leans back for a moment, her face outstretched to the clouds.

"Juvia never saw sunshine before, mother…not before Juvia met Gray-sama…but…but even if Juvia loves Gray-sama…he…he does not love Juvia….but…but Juvia will wait, mother…like you waited for father." She feels her body bend in half, a sob on the tip of her tongue. Her visage is so close to the earth that she feels as if it could swallow her whole, leaving only the meat of her marrow for memoriam.

"Mother…mother, Juvia is scared that she will be like you!" She says, her tears seeming to intensify the crashing of the raindrops around her. Her arms lock around her belly, effectively folding her so she is crying into the dirt. "L-loving a man who…who never…never puts flowers on Juvia's grave…who she waits for….for…forever and…and ever." She says, hiccuping between her words, crouching low to the ground, feeling the magic pulsing around her as the rain falls like angels to the dirt, muddied and soiled, impure.

"Juvia is scared that….Juvia is scared that she will…she will wait for Gray-sama for all her life and…and Gray-sama loves another and…and never visits her when she is gone…."

She pauses, sucking in deep, deep breaths through her open mouth, the dripping of the rain not letting up even as she breathes, her body quaking with how strong she inhales. Quietly, even more so than before, she says "Juvia wonders if mother is lonely…waiting for daddy…."

Her mouth screws up in a grimace as she tightens her arms around her. "Juvia was lonely when….when she waited for daddy…but daddy never came, mother…daddy left me all alone."

She finally closes her eyes, taking her gaze off of the pebbles and dirt, off the grime of the grave and trying to block off the smell of death as she calmed herself.

"Juvia loves Gray-sama…Gray-sama took away Juvia's rain…but sometimes, Juvia misses rain because rain is mother and father's gift to Juvia…" She says, tears slipping out of her shut eyes and coating her eyelashes more than mascara.

"But…Juvia loves…loves Gray-sama more than she loves herself….Juvia loves Gray-sama, mother. Did you love daddy like Juvia loves Gray-sama?" Her tears intensify. "Is that why he left, mommy? W-why did he leave? Why did you leave, mommy, leave Juvia all alone…so…so alone?" She asked, sobbing so hard that she feels her vertebrae moving under her skin, weeping, letting the tears fall out of her eyes and onto the grave.

"Juvia…Juvia never knew love like…like the love she feels for Gray-sama but if…if that is the love that Mommy had for Daddy…Juvia is scared…." She said as she squished her eyes as tightly as she possibly could, feeling the rain fight her for control as she tried, desperately, to stop it. She took even deeper breaths than before, realigning her bones and piecing herself together as she always did.

"Mother…" She said, finally composed enough not to call her the childish "mommy" she previously had. "Mother…Juvia is scared but you did not make a coward…Juvia takes your gift…the gift daddy helped with…and Juvia uses it…Juvia will…will not be sad…but Juvia…" She takes another breath, reminding herself that even those that live in rain need oxygen and smooths her skirts again.

"But Juvia….Juvia is the rain woman…Juvia has always been the rain woman…and Juvia just waits for the day that Gray-sama understands that….that rain is…vital. Rain is vital for anything to live. Juvia…Juvia is vital…Juvia has always been vital." She says, realigning her back so she is sitting up, her hands in her lap as she looks up at the heavens, trying to tell herself that her fingers are not ripping holes into her dress.

Trying to tell herself that she can really wait forever like her mother is.

"Drip….Drip…" She sobs out, tears falling off the sides of her cheeks like small waterfalls, disguised as rain, soaking her to the bones.

"Drop…."

* * *

**Don't kill me? I actually love Juvia as a character, but I feel as if...well, there's no way a woman can be so cheery when she's rejected all the time. Especially when you consider that Juvia was a sad character to begin with. I feel like...she has her moments when she's sorrowful, genuinely, and that she hasn't suddenly gotten all better. Also, this was an attempt to focus more on dialog, as I have a habit of writing paragraphs upon paragraphs of text without any words being spoken between two characters. So...yeah.  
**

**BTW, A**** Caelo Usque Ad Centrum** translates to mean "From The Sky To The Center" and I felt that it fit Juvia because to me, if Juvia is the rain, that means that Juvia is the clouds and the sky. Juvia is composed of something that gives Life and Life is the center of all, living with Death in the same cradle.  


**And as for those who are reading my Gevy fic dump: Shrapnel, I already have the next chapter written. It's a whopping 5,500 words, so prepare yourself. It should be up either tomorrow or the day after once I've edited it.  
**


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